250+ Women Jokes: Funny, Empowering & Inclusive

In the dynamic world of comedy, a great joke is more than just a punchline—it’s a reflection of our times, a tool for connection, and for 2025, a celebration of wit that is both smart and inclusive. This year, the landscape of women’s humor is richer than ever, blending classic setups with contemporary, empowering twists. Whether you’re looking for a laugh to share with friends, content for a Women’s Day celebration, or jokes that challenge stereotypes rather than reinforce them, you’ve come to the right place. We’ve curated the definitive list of women jokes for 2025, organized into categories that range from laugh-out-loud feminist one-liners to clever observational humor about everyday life. Get ready to explore a collection that guarantees laughter while respecting the intelligence and diversity of all women.

🤣 The Best Feminist Jokes for a LOL

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. It’s not the lightbulb that needs changing .
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Impatient feminist. Impatient fem— WHY DON’T WE HAVE EQUAL PAY YET?
A male feminist walks into a bar… Because it was set so low .
Instead of paying women the same as men, pay men the same as women and see how angry they get .
“Feminism? No thanks. I prefer gender equality. Water? No thanks. I prefer H20.”
You can always tell ambitious women apart by the shape of their heads… They’re flat on top from being patted patronizingly .
What do you call guys who make “women in the kitchen” jokes? Single .
What do you call a woman who has a lot of sex? Her name .
“Sexism is a man screaming he has a better temperament than a woman who has been patiently waiting to speak after being interrupted 10 times.”
“Every single party where women listen interestedly to men is an extended piece of performance art, and men have no idea.”
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. You don’t need lightbulbs when you have a glass ceiling .

💼 Witty Women’s Day Jokes and Quotes for 2025

“Behind every successful woman is herself… and probably a very large cup of coffee.” ☕
“Here’s to strong women: May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them, and may they always have good Wi-Fi!” 📶
“Why did the girl bring a ladder to the Women’s Day party? Because she wanted to be the best version of herself! 🪜
“A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong she is until you put her in hot water.” 🫖
“I am not bossy, I am the boss.” 👑
“Why do women make great stand-up comedians? Because their Women’s Day jokes can light up any room! 💡
“A woman’s greatest superpower? Turning any moment into a hilarious Women’s Day joke! 🦸♀️
“The key to great leadership? A great sense of humor, and a couple of Women’s Day jokes to keep things lively! 🗝️
“Empowered women empower women. And sometimes, they do it by sharing Women’s Day sarcastic quotes that make everyone smile! 😊
“A woman with a voice is, by definition, a strong woman, especially if her voice is telling a funny Women’s Day joke.” 🎤
“A powerful woman doesn’t just change the world; she also makes it a lot funnier with her Women’s Day joke! 🌍
“Happy Women’s Day! May your day be filled with laughter, love, and a few Women’s Day sarcastic quotes to keep it real.” 😉
“You don’t need a crown to feel royal, just the courage to smile, laugh, and share funny jokes on Women’s Day!” 👑
“Strong women don’t just empower themselves, they empower others with their strength and humor.” 🤝

😂 Sarcastic and Relatable Jokes About Modern Womanhood

“My mom called me today at 3 P.M., and the first thing she said to me was, ‘Did I wake you?’ Have you ever gotten a metaphorical and literal wake-up call at the exact same time?” — Comedian Emily Catalano
“My friends coined a word: hepeated. For when a woman suggests an idea and it’s ignored, but then a guy says same thing and everyone loves it.”
“EVERY WOMAN IN MY LIFE: juggling 3 jobs, does yoga, cooks, goes to therapy, remembers everyone’s birthday THEIR BOYFRIENDS: once almost made a dinner reservation but turns out the place was closed.”
“as a guy, you’re either into cars or you can make a girl cum. you can’t be both.”
“Dating guys in their 20s is an unpaid internship.”
“how is it possible that so few men are in therapy when every single man i’ve ever met should 100% be in therapy.”
“men should have curfews so women can go out at night.”
“Happy Women’s Day to the woman who has everything, except maybe a decent Wi-Fi connection.” 📶
“Here’s to the woman who’s doing it all, running the world, juggling responsibilities, and somehow finding time to tell Women’s Day sarcastic quotes.” 🤹♀️
“To the woman who has it all, except, of course, time for herself.” ⏰
“I refuse to ever teach my daughters the archaic concept of ‘losing one’s virginity’ as if some baby-dicked boy who drives a Honda Civic is really taking something special from you lmaaaoo grow up and overthrow the government.”
“Men who get mad when male superheroes are rebooted as women are called Thor losers. Thank you.”

👩‍💻 Office and Workplace Jokes for Professional Women

The workplace is a breeding ground for hilarious, often absurd, situations. These jokes for 2025 nail the unique comedy of corporate life, team dynamics, and the unspoken rules of the office.

“Happy Women’s Day to the woman who runs the office, because let’s face it, the rest of us are just here for the coffee.” ☕
In a job interview: “What’s your greatest weakness?” “I’m a perfectionist.” “I’m sorry, we’re looking for someone who is honest.” “Okay, I’m not a perfectionist.”
My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.
What’s the difference between a micromanager and a hands-on manager? About three hours of your time every day.
Team building exercise tomorrow. My real team-building exercise will be building the will to live.
“I’m not procrastinating. I’m strategically delaying my workflow to optimize peak performance periods.” (Aka, doing it all at the last minute).
Another meeting that could have been an email. And the email could have been a text. And the text could have been a thought.
My out-of-office reply is more respected than I am.
When HR says “We’re like a family here.” Yes, a dysfunctional one.
My coffee and I:
- Me: I need you to function.
- Coffee: I need you to make me.
- Me: It’s a symbiotic relationship.
“I’m not saying I run this place, but the wifi password is my name.”
My desk is a organized mess. I know where everything is, and if you touch it, I will know.
What’s a programmer’s favorite snack? Code-chips.
When the IT guy finally fixes your computer: “Sir, you have earned this cup of coffee and my eternal gratitude.”
Friday at 4:59 PM vs. Monday at 9:01 AM. The same person, but with a completely different soul.

💑 Funny Jokes About Dating and Relationships

“How did I meet your father? He shouted, ‘OI, YOU NOT GONNA SAY HELLO BACK TO ME, ARE YOU DEAF OR RUDE?’ as I walked past him, and I just knew.”
“Men love to date powerful women for 3-8 weeks.”
Definition of a successful husband: A man who earns more than his spouse can spend. Definition of a successful wife: A lady who is able to find such a man .
Love may be blind but marriage is a complete eye opener .
There are only 2 occasions where a man is unable to understand a woman, before marriage and after marriage .
My wife just stopped and said “You weren’t even listening were you”. I thought, that is a pretty weird way to start a conversation .
Little Johnny asks his dad “How much does it cost to get married dad?” His dad replies ” Well son, I’m not too sure, you see I am still paying for it.”
“Dick pics are the human equivalent of a cat giving you a dead bird as a ‘gift.'”
Me: “Why did you marry me?” My wife: “Because you are so funny”. Me: “I thought it was because I am so good in bed” My Wife: “You see? You are hilarious”
What is a man’s view of safe sex? A padded headboard .
What are the four words which are a sure fire way to demolish a mans ego? “Is it in yet?”
How are you able to tell when a man is sexually aroused? He is breathing .
What is the best way to get a man to stop chewing on his nails? Make him keep his shoes on .

🌍 Cultural and Global Perspectives on Humor for Women

In Japan, eating in silence is normal. Nobuko Miyata Petersen shares: “Eating in Japan seemed really funny to my Western ex-husband. When we eat, we don’t speak. We only have one mouth! We’re quiet and concentrate on the food.”
The French laugh at strangers in the street. Julie Canclini notes: “In France, we tend to laugh a lot at strangers in the streets… It’s not to be mean, it’s just a way to bond with the person you’re laughing with. I don’t think people would do that elsewhere.”
Humour is a subtle art that changes with location. “I noticed that my French sense of humour was too dark and corrosive for English tastes. Some replies I found witty and well-delivered were deemed too aggressive.”
Self-deprecating vs. assertive humor. “In assertive cultures (think of Latin countries) humour is often self-enhancing… Other cultures, like Celtic, Confucian or Japanese ones, are more self-deprecating.”
Who can tell a joke matters. “Inclusive and flat cultures seem to be more inclined to let people give it a try and tell a joke… On the other end of the spectrum, in groups with a hierarchical structure, the leaders are likely to supervise the sense of humour within the group.”

✨ Clean and Cheesy Jokes for a Guaranteed Smile

Sometimes, you just need a good, clean, corny joke. These are perfect for all audiences, safe for work, and guaranteed to induce a groan and a smile. They’re the timeless classics of the joke world.

Why did the girl bring a ladder to school? She wanted to go to high school!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the math book look so sad? Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
Why was the belt arrested? For holding up a pair of pants!
What do you call a sheep with no head and no legs? A cloud!
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
What do you call a dog that can do magic? A labracadabrador!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crumbly!

🧠 Intelligent and Witty Jokes for a Sharp Mind

“The future is female, empowered women have always been the catalysts for progress.” 🚀
“I’m going to scream about the importance of feminism to the world until my voice becomes hoarse enough to be mistaken for a man’s and people actually start to listen to me.”
“This computer’s mouse is so sensitive it’s like, what are you, a white straight guy being asked to admit that the system benefits you?”
“Instead of paying women the same as men, pay men the same as women and see how angry they get.”
“A cat-caller just said he wants to get ‘all up in my business,’ which is great because my taxes are complicated, and I could use some help.”
“Women belong in the kitchen. Men belong in the kitchen. Everyone belongs in the kitchen. The kitchen has food.”
“I accidentally said ‘pastryarchy’ instead of ‘patriarchy,’ and now I have a vision for a better world.”
“lana del rey just killed more men with the eight words ‘your poetry’s bad and you blame the news’ than a physical weapon ever could.”
“Salem Witch Trials 🤝 Men not knowing how things work and deciding that women are evil and must be punished.”
“HIM: ‘my dick is so big it stretches vaginas’ VAGINAS: [GIF of a canyon forming over millions of years]”
“20 Things That Women Should Stop Wearing After the Age of 30. 1 to 20: The weight of other people’s expectations and judgments.”
“Damn boy, are you a bra? Because you make me uncomfortable, but society has brainwashed me into believing I need you.”
“Opinions on abortions are kinda like nipples. Everyone has them, but women’s are a little bit more relevant. But all you ever see are men’s.”
“The knowing eye contact women make when men are talking is the purest human connection possible.”
“All these girls getting themselves pregnant. Wow, self-impregnating teenage girls, men should be afraid women are evolving at alarming rates.”

👗 Hilarious Jokes About Fashion, Beauty, and “Girl Dinner”

On “girl math”: “Discounts? That’s profit. Cash? Not real. A $100 bag over 20 uses is only $5 per wear? Practically free.”
On “girl dinner”: “It’s funny because it can be familiar: sometimes dinner really is just cheese and crackers, or cereal and fruit, or straight-up spoonfuls of peanut butter.”
On “I’m just a girl”: “Scroll long enough and it becomes a get-out-of-jail-free card to excuse mistakes, incompetence, or bad decisions. Strip down the laughs, and the joke boils down to: ‘Of course I messed up, I’m a girl.'”
I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it, just like a woman managing her day with humor. 🐟
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch.
I don’t mean to brag, but I finished my 14-step skincare routine today. I may not have saved the world, but my pores are flawless.
My hair has three moods:
1. “I just walked out of a salon.”
2. “I just walked through a hurricane.”
3. “I am a small, scared animal.”
What’s the difference between a good hair day and a bad hair day? About 30 minutes and half a can of hairspray.
My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry.
Online shopping cart: $450. Shipping: $8.99. Me: “That’s outrageous!”
Me, looking at my closet full of clothes: I have nothing to wear.
You know you’re an adult when you get excited about a new sponge. It’s the little things.
My personality is 50% coffee, 40% sarcasm, and 10% remembering to water my plants before they die.
Is “girl dinner” a meal or a cry for help? The world may never know.
“Girl math” is my favorite subject. It’s the only math where my calculations are always correct.

👭 Jokes for Your Best Girlfriends

These are the jokes you share in the group chat, the ones that only your best friends truly understand. They celebrate the powerful, hilarious, and unbreakable bond of female friendship.

A best friend is like a four-leaf clover: hard to find and lucky to have.
What do you call a sleepover with your best friends? Group therapy.
Our friendship is like glitter. You can never fully get rid of it, no matter how hard you try.
A true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes while everyone else believes the smile on your face.
How do you know when a friendship is real? When silence between you is comfortable.
We don’t need to talk every day to know we’re still in each other’s hearts.
Friends buy you lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.
Our inside jokes are my favorite language.
A circle is round, it has no end. That’s how long I’m going to be your friend.
You don’t have to be foolish to be my friend. I’ll train you.
We fell in love with each other’s weirdness.
Thank you for being the reason I smile on a daily basis.
I’d rather walk with a friend in the dark than alone in the light.
We single-handedly keep the wine industry in business.

👶 Mom Jokes: Because Motherhood is Hilarious

From pregnancy to parenting, motherhood is a rollercoaster of hilarious moments. These jokes capture the chaotic, beautiful, and utterly funny reality of being a mom in 2025.

I’m not a regular mom, I’m a cool mom. (Said while wearing stained sweatpants and drinking cold coffee).
My favorite childhood memory is when my mom would let me nap. Said no child ever.
Pregnancy: The only time in your life when you get to be a total diva and everyone is happy for you.
My body is 60% water and 40% goldfish crackers I stole from my toddler.
The most accurate part of pregnancy in movies is the weird cravings. No, I don’t know why I need pickles with peanut butter, but I do.
My brain is 10% useful information and 90% lyrics to children’s TV shows.
What’s a mom’s superpower? The ability to function on three hours of broken sleep.
I need a vacation from the vacation we took with the kids.
My love language is folding the laundry while complaining about folding the laundry.
I’m not “just” a mom. I’m a chef, a chauffeur, a nurse, a therapist, and a professional snuggler.
The days are long, but the years are short. And the laundry basket is always full.
My phone is 98% photos of my kids and 2% everything else.
I said I’d never bribe my kids with screen time. Then I had kids.
My greatest talent is finding a lost binky in the dark at 3 AM.
This is our daily reminder that you are doing an amazing job, mom!

❓ Frequently Asked Questions About Women Jokes

What are some good clean jokes for women?

Clean jokes are universal and focus on wordplay, lighthearted observations, and everyday life. The “Clean and Cheesy Jokes” and “Intelligent and Witty Jokes” sections above are filled with hilarious, audience-appropriate material that doesn’t rely on offensive tropes .

How can I make sure my women jokes aren’t offensive?

The key is to punch up, not down. Jokes that challenge power structures (like the patriarchy) or that highlight shared experiences from a female perspective are generally well-received. Avoid jokes that rely on negative stereotypes about women’s driving, intelligence, or emotions. When in doubt, use the empowering and feminist jokes in this article as a guide .

Where can I find feminist jokes?

You’re in the right place! The very first section of this article, “The Best Feminist Jokes for a 2025 LOL,” is dedicated entirely to sharp, smart, and funny feminist humor that promotes equality and laughs at the patriarchy .

Are there cultural differences in women’s humor?

Absolutely. Humor is deeply cultural. What is funny in one culture can be confusing or even offensive in another. For a deeper dive into this, check out the “Cultural and Global Perspectives on Humor for Women” section, which explores how women’s humor varies from Japan to Mexico to France .

What are some funny jokes for a Women’s Day celebration?

The “Witty Women’s Day Jokes and Quotes for 2025” section is specifically designed for this purpose! It’s packed with inspirational and funny one-liners and quotes perfect for speeches, social media posts, or toasts during your International Women’s Day events .

Conclusion

The world of women’s jokes in 2025 is a vibrant and diverse space, offering everything from biting feminist wit to relatable slices of life. The best humor connects us, makes us think, and provides a much-needed release. This collection proves that comedy can be both uproariously funny and powerfully positive, celebrating women without putting others down. We hope this ultimate list has given you a wealth of new material to share, making your 2025 a year filled with laughter, connection, and joy. Remember, a day without laughter is a day wasted, so go forth and spread the funny!

Charles K Baxter

I am Charles K Baxter, a humor enthusiast passionate about spreading joy and positivity through laughter.